Did you know that Regression is an everyday occurrence?

Sometimes I become regressed! My cellular memory kicks into high gear and starts firing certain thoughts and then feelings of inadequacy, fear, confusion and lack of clarity starts to rise and the words start filling my head~

~You are in trouble

~There is a price to be paid

~You are not likable

~You did something wrong

~They are mad at you

~You have to make this better

~You have to figure out what you did to make them act this way and fix it

Can you relate to any of the above? 

You are going about your business and all of a sudden ~WHAM~ you’re caught up in someone else’s story or mood or experience and it takes you out of YOU! Its like a tidal wave came in and swept you away with it. Maybe not that drastic but you get the picture.

Regression is a return to a former less developed part of self. A time in our psyche’s when things might have been scary or unsafe in our lives. A time when we didn’t have the tools or the words or the understanding that what was going on around us probably had nothing to do with us and was not our fault. But no one was letting us know that we weren’t to blame so we developed a protective mechanism inside of ourselves to cope with the discomfort and uncertainty of what we thought was our fault. 

No matter how much I dive into my psyche there will be a time when something will trigger a feeling of regression around a situation.  I am not saying that these things happen out of the blue. I actually don’t believe that things just happen to us. But all the “stars are aligned” (so to speak) and I was ready for a regressive feeling to take me over. I like it best when I have some semblance of an understanding about the regressive dive I might be taking but sometimes it just sweeps me away and it’s only in retrospect that I am able to see it for what it is. A former self! A disempowered self! A younger and unsure part of myself!

So what to do?

~Try to identify how you are feeling

~Try to identify the trigger that is causing this regression or this sensation

~Try to stop and breathe into the discomfort of what you are feeling

~Become aware that you are having uncomfortable feelings around this particular situation and if possible do not take an action

~Try to notice everything.

~Do not react and if possible do not speak directly to the person or experience that is triggering this discomfort. It is not the time to try and figure this out because your former self will be the one talking at that moment so a satisfactory conclusion cannot be had during the regression.

~Know that this is “normal” and everyone at times is regressed. 

Being conscious of your regression brings you to the halfway point so that you can be in contact with the regression. 

These are not easy things to do in the moment. But if you can be aware of the idea of regression than you can create a safety net for yourself if and when you become regressed. There is no shame in regression. It happens to all of us. However, I know that shame can take us over when we are not in contact with those young parts of ourselves and we start speaking from those parts instead of being in awareness about what is going on internally. 

It is in the awareness of the regression that will bring us forward with clarity around what is taking place internally. 

Try to be gentle with yourself through the tumult of this experience and you WILL come out on the other side more present and Adult.